If you’re on an online dating website, it’s likely you’ve encountered a scammer. But what are the glaringly obvious signs right from the start they want more than your heart?
- The Overly Flattering Opener: “Wow, you’re stunning! I can’t believe my luck stumbling upon your profile.”
- Psychological Impact: This message plays on the victim’s desire for validation and flattery, making them more receptive to further communication with the scammer.
- The Immediate Request for Contact Information: “Hey, let’s chat off this site. Here’s my number: [Phone number].”
- Psychological Impact: This message creates a sense of urgency and exclusivity, making the victim feel special and potentially lowering their guard to share personal information quickly.
- The Professing of Love Too Soon: “I feel like I’ve known you forever. I think I’m falling for you already.”
- Psychological Impact: This message triggers feelings of affection and intimacy prematurely, leading the victim to believe a deep connection has been established, even though it’s likely manipulation.
- The Sob Story: “I’ve had such a rough time lately. I could really use a kind soul like you to talk to.”
- Psychological Impact: This message elicits empathy and compassion from the victim, making them more willing to engage with the scammer and potentially provide emotional support.
- The Impersonal Copy-Paste Message: “Hi there, I saw your profile and thought you seemed interesting. How are you?”
- Psychological Impact: While seemingly harmless, this message may create a false sense of familiarity, leading the victim to believe the scammer has genuine interest in them, when in reality, it’s likely a generic message sent to multiple people.
- The Too-Good-to-Be-True Offer: “Would you like to join me on an all-expenses-paid trip to [Exotic Location] next weekend?”
- Psychological Impact: This message triggers excitement and anticipation in the victim, enticing them with the prospect of luxury and adventure, potentially clouding their judgment regarding the legitimacy of the offer.
- The Immediate Request for Money: “I hate to ask, but I’m in a bind. Can you lend me some money? I promise to pay you back.”
- Psychological Impact: This message preys on the victim’s sense of empathy and desire to help others in need, potentially leading them to overlook red flags and send money to the scammer.
- The Suspiciously Vague Profile Link: “Hey, I’m new here. Can you check out my profile on this other site? [Link]”
- Psychological Impact: This message triggers curiosity in the victim, prompting them to click on the link out of a desire to learn more about the scammer, potentially exposing them to phishing scams or malware.
- The Eager to Move Off the Platform: “I’m not a big fan of chatting here. Let’s exchange emails instead.”
- Psychological Impact: This message creates a false sense of intimacy and exclusivity, making the victim feel special for being chosen to communicate with outside the dating platform, potentially leading to further manipulation.
- The Flirty and Explicit: “You’re so sexy. I can’t stop thinking about what we could do together.”
- Psychological Impact: This message triggers feelings of arousal and excitement in the victim, potentially clouding their judgment and making them more susceptible to further advances from the scammer.
- The Mysterious Identity: “I prefer to keep a low profile online. Let’s get to know each other without revealing too much.”
- Psychological Impact: This message creates intrigue and curiosity in the victim, enticing them to engage further with the scammer in an attempt to uncover their mysterious identity, potentially leading to manipulation and deceit.
- The Immediate Talk of Future Plans: “I have a feeling you and I could have something special. Can you imagine us together in a year?”
- Psychological Impact: This message triggers feelings of hope and excitement in the victim, making them more receptive to the scammer’s advances and more likely to overlook potential red flags in pursuit of a romantic connection.
- The Pity Card: “I’ve been hurt so many times before. I hope you’re different.”
- Psychological Impact: This message elicits empathy and a desire to prove oneself in the victim, making them more likely to engage with the scammer in an attempt to provide comfort and reassurance.
- The Too Quick to Jump into Personal Topics: “What’s your deepest fear? I want to know everything about you.”
- Psychological Impact: This message creates a false sense of intimacy and trust, making the victim feel valued and understood, potentially leading them to disclose sensitive information prematurely to the scammer.
- The Pushy Meeting Request: “I know we just started talking, but I really want to meet you in person. How about this weekend?”
- Psychological Impact: This message creates a sense of urgency and excitement in the victim, making them more likely to agree to a meeting despite not knowing the scammer well, potentially putting themselves in a risky situation.